Our friends at Morning Brew continue to impress, dropping a Parenting Brew this past weekend full of data, stories, and insights that I would like to showcase. Naming the ground truth on what families are experiencing is the best way to understand the state of play, explore available options, and determine helpful paths forward. So, what does it look like?
There are a “growing number of Americans who provide financial support to their adult children. Half of parents with adult kiddos helped at least one of them financially in 2025, up from 45% in 2023, according to a Savings.com survey. Often, it’s more than a one-off Trader Joe’s gift card:
- Less than half of American adults age 18 to 34 say they are entirely financially independent from their parents, according to a 2024 Pew report.
- And it’s not just college-aged adults: More than a third of those age 30 to 34 still aren’t financially independent from mom and dad.
- The average yearly support amounts to $7,000 per family, according to a recent AARP survey.”
And per Unusual Whales on X, “25% of millenials have received down payment assistance from their parents, and 26 percent said they would not have been able to buy their current home when they did without that help, per Visa.”
The Parenting Brew gives even more context, “While today’s young women are more likely to be financially self-sufficient than in the past, young men have become more reliant on their parents. In 2021, 36% of 25-year-old men depended on their parents for cash flow, compared with 23% in 1980. Researchers say the trend is driven by a tough job market and the rising cost of living, including soaring rents and college tuition saddling people with loans.
Almost half of Americans age 18 to 29 live with their parents, according to a Federal Reserve report published last year, up from 37% in 2019. The rise of multigenerational households is partly why many boomers are choosing not to downsize their homes as they age. As of 2022, the median baby boomer-headed household is sitting on $432k in wealth—about 30% more than their parents’ generation.”
So where does all of this leave us? We’ve all gotten some help from Mom and Dad, that’s common. However, I’m not going to wade into the debate of how much and when, these are family specific details that can only be defined by the family. But I will be adamant that we need to have these family conversations regularly, openly, and hopefully at our kitchen tables.
But how do we know what should be done? Or at the very least, what can be done? First, we need to have family estate planning conversations so everyone is clear on the different expectations, wishes, and hopes. Second, we need to organize the estate so we are clear on the family wealth situation and projections. And third, we can optimize the adulting process aligned with the estate plan so that the family can help itself. We can do this, together. We can move our families forward…